In mid-January of 2008, I weighed 270 pounds. Yes, 270. Well, at least that’s what I think. When I first got up the courage to step on the scale – after dieting and exercising for 6 weeks – I weighed 265.
I cried.
For the first year of this multi-year diet, I lost 5 pounds a month, so I’m guess-timating that I weighed 5 pounds more when I started.
Only a couple of people know the actual number. It's not like it was a secret. I've seen pictures. I looked my weight. But saying it ... that's so out-there-for-all-to-see. I don't want to watch their expression. And the comments ... I can just imagine. "You weighed how much!" "Really, I thought it was more." I'm not ready for that.
I'm dealing with it to a degree. I've lost 72 pounds -- roughly 3/5s of the way to goal. But this is about more than loosing weight. I need to confront why I gained over 100 pounds. Otherwise, I can slip back into my old ways and put it all back on. I need to change.
The picture above is me in December 2007. It rotates with all the staff pictures in the lobby where I work. Even though I've lost part of that weight, I can't escape the great white neck picture. I hate it, but it's part of the reason I quit procrastinating.
I plateaued in early in 2009 and broke free … and now it’s happening again. I need to refocus and I hope blogging will help.
I'm fine with total strangers reading this. If you're going through something similar, maybe this will help. You're not alone. But will I tell my friends and co-worker? I'm not sure. Maybe not.
But there’s more to my life than weight loss – hence the title – Fat, Family and Other F Words.
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